What a week to be reminded of firsts: first blog post, first week in Arizona, and first time coming off my horse. Alright, so maybe two of the three were more enjoyable. But they each had their own roses and thorns.

Writing has been a passion of mine since I remember reading on my own. I loved the freedom of the pen to tell a story, and the voice that could come through the pages. When I started hearing feedback from colleagues, friends and family about documenting my adventures, a blog started stirring within me. Truthfully, I didn’t think I’d start this early. I was planning to start in the new year, like many new goals. But then I thought why wait? How many times do we wait for that “perfect” moment?

Positioning on my horse is a constant focus in any run. There can be several “spots” for my horse to be in relation to the cow, that will allow me to successfully rope. It is more of a circle of area where I want to be. Once I am in that circle of success, I throw! Many times it will get tougher, and more variables can work against me the longer I wait. But I must be confident in the position and prepared with the position of my body to deliver.

After time off this summer, the visual picture of my horse position was more blurry than clear. Cash was quite excited to be back at his favorite job. After a few runs of getting too close to the dummy, I wanted to rope faster and farther back. The next run, I had a goal to get there and deliver faster. I was leaning in my right stirrup too much, which caused me to be unbalanced when he decided to cheat me a bit on my throw. Holding onto the reins, it all played in slow motion as I seemed to hover over my saddle, right foot in the stirrup, unaware of what would hit the ground first. I kept holding the reins to keep him close to me, and in a slow unfolding, found two feet on the ground.

I took a deep breath. We both knew this didn’t play out how we wanted to. There’s more to getting to the position of success besides just getting there. I also needed to be in the right position on my horse for us to have a high percentage shot.

We built a lot of confidence in our positioning this week, both in and out of the arena. Coming off my horse wasn’t the plan, but we started, we learned, and refocused energy where it needed to go. It reminded me of a podcast I listened to about starting the day with the Lord: “When we begin in a quiet place, setting our hearts on the one higher than us, it allows us to give the day back to Him. Rather than going through the day like a high-speed chase, it releases the day, like the gently unfolding of a napkin for us to enjoy every moment.” I’m not sure who said it but isn’t it a calming picture? Often, this is the imagery I go back to when thinking about my roping, especially when it isn’t coming together like I want it to. How do I want this run to unfold?

You will have opportunities come into position for you to take your shot, but you must also personally be in a position to deliver. Wanting it more or over-working the process won’t get you there faster and may cause you to become off-balance. Whatever you are trying to “catch” in your life, think of the position you yourself need to be in. When it comes, you’ll be ready to deliver, like the graceful unfolding of a napkin, and enjoy the victory.

We had many victories in the roping pen this week after redirecting some goals and building confidence. Me and Grams have become more settled outside of the arena as well. While we were driving one day, I thought about the times when she would take care of me as a little girl. It was kind of wild for me to think about knowing her in her 60’s and now she’s 87. I asked her “Can you believe we are doing this?” She said, “Well, Claire, it’s always been an adventure with you. But how lucky am I that I’ve gotten to spend so much time with my granddaughters. And still get to.”

Doesn’t that just pull on your heart? She’s still quite able, strong, and I think sassier these days than I recall. I am used to spending a lot of time to myself, scheduling my days for myself, my business, and my animals. Adding an additional dog and a sassy Grams has created quite the garden, but I’m thankful to be tending to it. Sure, it’s a rose garden most days, but there is a lot more work and effort involved with someone who needs me.

I called home to my mom. Someone who raised three girls would have a lot of experience in how to make choices, schedule time, and be available when needed. I was feeling a little discouraged, tired, and kind of frustrated with how to handle everything on my plate. She was quick to ask, “Did you pray for patience? Because you know God will send you something to be patient through.” I chuckled, recalling the other times in my life she had cautioned me of the prayers that will yield reasons to make me patient. “No,” I replied gently smiling, “I haven’t been praying for patience. I’ve been praying that I would have the senses and features of Christ to see, hear, and think like He does.”

The conversation reminded me of a mindset discussed in the book, Your Best Year Ever. Michael Hyatt writes about a mindset of scarcity and a mindset of abundance. All I needed was that conversation with my mom to realize I was operating in a scarcity mindset. Rather than seeing ALL the good abundance in this season, I was looking at the tasks and workload thinking how will I get this done? What a blessing it is to be very specific with my time and goals! How great is it to now have this blog and creative outlet to schedule, to think of my day in a new light, and get to live it? How quickly burdens turn to blessings when we choose to come up higher.

There opened an opportunity in my business to come up higher as well—a thorn that became a rose garden. A group of people had really welcomed me to their organization, but I had been receiving a lot of pushbacks, and quite frankly, disrespect, from my competition in this area. Not one to shy away from a challenge, I continued to put forth effort there, thinking this will break open. It was taxing—mentally and emotionally. This week, the opportunities broke open. The situation showed me this was no longer a useful place for me to exert my time. The example of this experience I used was that of a “bad boyfriend.” This relationship continues to promise great partnership, talks of high value, and importance of showing up, and contributing, but offers nothing in return. The “bad boyfriend” keeps your hopes up, thinking, “If I show up one more time, maybe this will be the time things change.” And they never do.

Sometimes the opportunity that breaks open is the gift in knowing you can move on. Who and where you choose to devote energy to is a value proposition. You are valuable. Your time is valuable. Relationships aren’t mean to be transactional, but they do require effort. Effort often looks different in the relationship, but in the end, it should look like respect. This is true for your hobbies, too. Does the effort you spend on leisure bring you joy? Or does the effort fall flat as more work? Effort not reciprocated is energy that needs to be redirected. Where can you redirect stale energy in your life?

My back tack served as my office for the phone call that respectfully cut ties. I sat for a minute, thinking about where I would redirect this energy in my business. Suddenly, a fresh wind of enlightenment and inspiration came upon me. I gave myself permission to redirect energy in my business. Why not get more specific about other areas of my life, too?

I turned around in my trailer and looked at the barrel saddle I used on occasion. I didn’t come to Arizona to be a barrel racer. I came here to rope. I knew right then and there it was time to sell my barrel saddle. I needed a more “burn the ships” mentality when it came to my roping. I’m not going back. Not saying I won’t ever barrel race, but it’s not my goal right now. And right now, I’m not a barrel racer, I’m a roper. I refuse to lie to myself about who I am. Although the barrel saddle in my trailer wasn’t a falsification of who I was, selling it was a reason to spend more time in my rope saddle, and more time where I’m called. And man did it feel good.

After this grand epiphany, I got to spend some quality time in my rope saddle out of the arena on a trail ride. My friend, Sarah, is involved and a member of an all-women’s riding group in Arizona known as Las Damas. She invited me on their monthly ride as her guest. Cash and I were both glad for a change of scenery, and some time among the rocks and cacti.  

Sarah was up front with the leader of the ride, and I was third horse. The only time Cash goes out of the arena is to look for cows. He was on the lookout, jigging for much of the ride, but he respected my request for him to stay in line with the other horses. I kind of made a game out of our third-place position, rating him like I would on a steer in the roping pen. Some time on the ride had passed as my mind wandered, much like it does when I drive. Ever so clearly, I heard the still small voice in my heart say, “Look around.”

Don’t get too caught up in looking at the tail in front of you that you forget to look up at what’s around you.

There’s a lot of good to enjoy on the trail besides just the getting there. I know I put a lot of emphasis on position, which is still important, but there’s more to the journey besides the arrival. Every winner has a tale of the trail that got him there. It’s always interesting to hear the interviewers ask, “What would you have done differently in those early days?” Quite often, I hear a response about enjoying the time leading up to the success and the winning. We’ve all heard “winning isn’t everything.” But we all want to win at whatever we are going at in life.

Before we left for Arizona, there was a little family gathering on Gram’s side with some extended family members. My dad and his cousins swapped stories, laughing and all chiming in with their experiences. Word circulated the room that Gram’s was coming with me to Arizona, and cousin Joel was quite interested in my roping. As we were getting ready to leave, Joel came up to the car window and beamed, “When you get down to Arizona, you go and win because you come from a family of winners.” He finished with, I’m excited for you.

The smile on my face and redness I feel in my cheeks right now tells you how much that impressed upon me. I’m taking that winning attitude with me into every field I’m in. This week inspired my winning attitude to reach new heights, not just in the roping pen. Winning the blog was starting before I was ready. Winning Arizona meant looking up and getting a higher perspective. Winning in roping was finding that confidence in positioning again. It’s the little pieces that sometimes no one else but you will see that build the victory in the end. How sweet it is to put forth your best, only for you and God, before the world will see? And even if the world doesn’t, your best is worth giving. I said it about my blog this week, “Even if it doesn’t get read, I’ll be glad I thought it when I did.”

Winning starts with your first step. Even if no one sees it, be glad you did your best when you did. And don’t be afraid to burn some ships or breakup with dead energy in your life. Direct your focus to the trail you’re called on and enjoy the scenery along the way. Until next week, happy trails to you and your journey.

Claire